Butterfly Hug

Practice

A self-administered form of bilateral stimulation — arms crossed over the chest, hands alternately tapping each shoulder in a slow, rhythmic pattern — widely used for self-soothing and resource installation.

Also known as: butterfly tap, butterfly tapping, self-hug tapping

The butterfly hug is a simple self-administered bilateral stimulation technique: you cross your arms over your chest and tap alternately on each shoulder in a slow, steady rhythm. It was developed by EMDR therapists Lucina Artigas and Ignacio Jarero in 1998 while working with child survivors of Hurricane Pauline in Mexico, and has since become one of the most widely used self-soothing techniques in EMDR-informed practice.

The technique is effective for two reasons. First, it provides the left-right rhythm of bilateral stimulation without any equipment — no headphones, no moving dot on a screen, no therapist. Second, the posture itself (arms wrapped across the chest) delivers gentle self-containment that many nervous systems read as soothing.

How to do the butterfly hug

  1. Sit comfortably. Cross your arms over your chest so each hand rests on the opposite upper arm or shoulder — fingertips pointing toward your collarbones.
  2. Begin tapping alternately — left hand, then right, then left again — at a slow, steady pace. Roughly one tap per second is a good starting point.
  3. Breathe normally. You are not trying to make anything happen.
  4. Continue for 30 seconds to two minutes, or until you feel settling or completeness.
  5. Pause, notice what has shifted in your body, then decide whether to do another round.

When it’s useful

  • Self-soothing in the moment. Anxious thought spiral, racing heart, a wave of distress that doesn’t need deep processing — the butterfly hug is often enough.
  • Installing a resource. After visualizing a calm place or bringing a positive memory to mind, several rounds of butterfly-hug tapping can help that resource feel more solid and accessible later.
  • Grounding in public. The posture reads as a natural self-hug and can be done unobtrusively.

When to use something else

If you are in emotional flooding or outside your window of tolerance, the butterfly hug alone may not be enough. Combine it with orienting (looking around the room), feet firmly on the floor, or — if things do not settle — reach out for support.